The Adoption Triad: Birth Parents (Part 1)

by Anna Glendenning | More from this Blogger

09 Mar 2006 07:03 PM

I don't claim to know what it might feel like to place a baby for adoption. I do however, feel it is important that the Families.com Adoption Blog include supportive information for those considering an adoption plan and for those birthparents who have placed their babies with adoptive families.

Adoption is a life changing experience for three different groups of people. The Adoption Triad consists of birthparents, adoptive parents, and the adopted person. In the past, each of the members of the triad were seen and treated as parallel lives and often disconnected. Today, society is changing and in many ways has come to understand that all the members of the triad are valuable and important to each other, not only at the time the adopted child is placed, but for the entire lifetime of the child.

This series of Blog entries is based on research and not on my own personal experiences. When writing about such a personal topic it is important to remember that every person is different and unique. While some birthmothers and birthfathers may feel one way or another this series is in no way meant to over generalize or assume that each and every birthparent might share the same experiences.

My intention with this series is to discusses some of the emotional issues that parents face when they have made the decision to place their baby for adoption. The research I have done for this series includes some personal stories birthparents have written about their own personal stories. And, information from research studies about the experiences of birthparents and the emotional feelings common for many after the adoption.

The purpose of this series is to promote understanding and serve as a way to bring the members of the adoption triad together. My hope is that this information may be a helpful resource for birthparents, and those who want to be supportive of birthparents. I also hope this series will offer information to adopted persons and adoptive parents who want to understand the real and emotional issues faced by birth parents.

This series will cover three areas:

• Some of the feelings and experiences birthparents often share about grief, loss, shame and guilt, identity issues, and the impact of these emotional issues.
• Information about ways of coping and managing the feelings that have been found helpful for many birthparents.
• Resources to help birthparents find information and to locate support groups of people who share the same experiences.

If you are a birthparent and would like to add anything to the information here or share a your own personal experience I invite you to make a comment, post on the adoption forum or send me a private message. Society has come a long way in the past 20-30 years in our attitudes about adoption but, there is always room for improvement and this is my goal in writing this series.

• Before and At Placement
• Loss and Grief
• Shame and Guilt
• Identity Issues
• Acceptance
• Healing

Special Needs and Adoption-Related Terms: A | B | C | D | E-F | G-H-I | J-K-L | M | N-O | P | Q-R | S | T-U-V-W-X-Y-Z

For more information about parenting special needs children you might want to visit the Families.com Special Needs Blog and the Mental Health Blog. Or visit my personal website.

Learn more about Anna Glendenning

Anna Glendenning is a mother of four. Two biological children grown and out of college, and two siblings and adopted together in 2003. Anna's Personal Website http://www.adoptiveparentsnetwork.

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