Semi-Open and Open Adoption in Domestic Adoption

by kvSheldon | More from this Blogger

03 Feb 2006 08:30 PM

At some point during the adoption process a prospective adoptive couple or individual has to decide whether they would like to have a closed, semi-open, or open adoption. In my previous post I discussed some of the advantages and disadvantages of a closed adoption. In this post I will discuss the option of semi-open and open adoption.

Open Adoption tends to be defined as when the birthmother or birthparents and the adoptive parents share identifying information about each other. This would include last names, addresses, and phone numbers. The adoptive parents and birthmother may also get together with the child at times. There is ongoing communication with the birthmother, whether that be through letters, e-mails, and phone calls.

Semi-open Adoption, similar to open adoption, means that there is still on-going communication, but it may only be through letters and the agency may act as the middleman since addresses are not shared. The birthmother would no longer have face-to-face contact with the child.

Through long-term research it has been found that semi-open and open adoption has many advantages for all parties in the triad. For the birthmother, receiving correspondences with updates on how the infant or child is growing, along with pictures, allows her to know that she made the right decision and helps with the grieving process. For the adoptive parents it has been found that they have a better feeling of security that the birthmother will not try to claim the child. Also adoptive parents will be more equipped with information about the adoption and the birthparents when the child asks difficult questions. For the child there is less confusion about who the parent is. They also have a better sense of self identity as well, since the adoptive parent will be able to tell them about their birthparents.

All adoptions are different when looking at open and semi-open adoption. What type of adoption that is agreed on by the triad varies from family to family. One should look at semi-open and open adoption along a continuum with minimal identifying information and correspondence provided in a case of semi-open adoption to full disclosure of identifying information and visits between the triad in an open adoption. Again every situation is different.

For the most part if a couple goes through an agency for a domestic adoption, the agency will at least require that the prospective adoptive couple agrees to have a semi-open adoption. The birthmother most likely will be the deciding factor on what type of adoption she is willing to accept when making her adoption plan and will choose a couple who have also agreed to the same type of adoption. A contract is usually drawn between parties and signed.

One aspect of semi-open and open adoption is that it will change over time. At times the adoptive family may have more communication with the birthmother than at others, depending on what is going on in the birthmother's life. Also, at some point the birthmother may decide she no longer wants any contact at all or may move away and not leave any forwarding information. My recommendation when talking to couples who are starting the process is to start with semi-open adoption and keep an open mind. It's the middle ground and the benefits are good for all. As you go through the adoption process and you meet the birthmother your decision may change.

Learn more about kvSheldon

My name is Kathy Sheldon and I live in Northern NJ with my husband, Jeff, my 15 month old son, Connor, two cats, a bird, and the newest addition our 10 week old Bernese Mountain puppy.

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