More People-Watching (Reading)

by Pam Connell | More from this Blogger

11 Oct 2009 12:18 AM

Last week I wrote about Katherine Heigl's newly adopted daughter, who is ten months old and was adopted from Korea. The same issue of People which told that story (The October 5 issue) has several other adoption-related stories, like the update on the teenage couple who placed their baby for adoption-and had the process chronicled on MTV's reality show, 16 and Pregnant. I will summarize that article in my next blog.

Two other stories in the issue are relevant to adoption, although not directly about it. The first of these is a profile of a mother and daughter. The 12-year-old daughter is gifted; her divorced mother has an IQ of 70. (For reference: normal IQ is 100; 70 is the IQ portrayed in the movie character Forrest Gump.)

The mother works at a fast-food restaurant and receives Social Security Disability income and food stamps. She has 20 hours a week of support from staffers of Community Interactions, a nonprofit organization. Her staffers help with grocery shopping, bill paying, locating parenting classes, and other tasks which come up. Her daughter's godmother picks her up at school and helps with homework, but she, the helpers, and her daughter's teachers agree that for the most part, Bonnie and Myra are like any mother and daughter. Psychology professor and parenting expert Dr. Sandra Azar approves. "If we take these kids away from their parents, are we giving them a better life in foster care?" she asks.

I've written before about embryo adoption. People's October 5 issue had an article that, while not exactly about adoption, does involve one woman's kids preparing to say goodbye to the child their mother is now carrying, and another family whose child will be borne by someone else. This is the story of the couples affected by the mistaken implantation of one woman's embryos into another woman's body. The gestational mother is preparing to voluntarily surrender the children, although she says she is heartbroken because a doctor has told her this must be her last pregnancy, and because her children are struggling to understand why the baby inside their mother will not live with them. The genetic parents say they are trying to respect the pregnant woman's privacy, but have met her once and email frequently. They plan to be at the hospital for their son's birth.

The gestational mother and her husband have a strong faith and never considered terminating the pregnancy. The husband says, "At the end of the day, there's a new life coming."

People ran a sidebar about a woman who learned in 2001 that she'd been implanted with another couple's embryo-and they wanted custody of the ten-month-old she'd thought was her son. After a lengthy court battle, the genetic parents and and the birthing mother share custody.

Learn more about Pam Connell

Pam Connell is a mother of three by both birth and adoption. She has worked in education, child care, social services, ministry and journalism.

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