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Crack Moms, A National Problem

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Every state has children available for adoption that have been seriously damaged by being in the womb of a woman who is addicted to crack cocaine. It was the intention of our Creator that the womb would be a very safe place, but it is not for many children coming into this world. My experience in this area is the result of adopting five children whose birth mother was addicted to cocaine. At age twenty-nine, their birth mother had given birth to seven damaged children in nine years, having been a crack addict since she was fifteen. She now tests … Continue reading →

Mom Boss

It’s the battle of the Hallmark holidays: National Bosses Day vs. Sweetest Day. Typically, National Bosses Day is celebrated on October 16th, but since the 16th falls on a Saturday this year, it was moved to October 15th. Another reason for the move is that in 2010, Sweetest Day, which is celebrated on the third Saturday in October, falls on the 16th. What to do? In a perfect world moms would get pampered on both days. Heh! So what if the occasions are canned Hallmark holidays? We moms will take what we can get. Show a little love for the … Continue reading →

Is a Society That Disregards Children Civilized?

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Some years ago, my wife and I went on two church trips. First, we went to New York City to work with a children’s ministry based in a distressed section of Brooklyn. As previously reported, we found the average child to be living in appalling conditions. In some areas, young children consistently had black, rotten baby teeth. The children were essentially taking care of themselves. The main problem was that their parents were either physically absent or totally absorbed with their own issues. The reason for all of this chaos was drug addiction and the crime that it causes. We … Continue reading →

Toddler Brutally Murdered by His Father

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Two years ago, twenty-five year old Daniel Hernandez was arrested for brutally shaking his one month old son and severely injuring him. Since then, he had been free on bond. The agreement on which his freedom was based stipulated that he would not be with the boy. Now the child is dead and Hernandez is in jail once again. After the 2005 incident, the child lived with Hernandez’s aunt. The mother, twenty-one year old Jessica Ann Emhoolah, was required to go to counseling and take parenting skills classes. She did everything that the court asked her to do and this … Continue reading →

Trying to Rescue Disadvantaged Kids

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Nancy and I had worked with disadvantaged young people who lived near our church for some time. We were determined to give at least some of them a chance to be successful. At best, it was always a “three steps forward, two steps back” proposition. Most of the kids lived in cramped apartments characterized by poor living conditions. Many of their parents had substance abuse problems and the kids had very little supervision. Crack dealers operated openly where they lived, no one seemed to care. The young people were quick to get angry and were always one smart remark away … Continue reading →

The Impact of Exposure to Cocaine in the Womb

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A few years ago, there was a lot of information in the media concerning the damage that women who habitually use crack cocaine were causing to the children born to them. Today, there is a lot of evidence that the damage was not as profound as some medical researchers predicted it would be. This is an important subject to me because I have adopted five children who had the misfortune to spend nine months in the womb of a crack addict. I do not pretend to be an expert on this subject. I am forced to rely on the information … Continue reading →

Being Prepared for the Future

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Fifteen years ago, my wife and I took a trip to Brooklyn to work with an inner city ministry to children that was located in an area called Bushwick. It was very dangerous; we could not get a taxi to take us there from the airport. We knew the risk, but we wanted the training that this experience would give us. Several people who knew Bushwick, advised us not to go. We figured that if God was sending us, then He would protect us. On our arrival, we were given a quick tour of the area. There was an armed … Continue reading →

Adoptive Parenting Traits, More Part 3

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I didn’t finish my third blog in the traits of adoptive parents series. I had illustrated how recovery and restoration from the hurtful and damaging things in the child’s past might sometimes take a very long time to be fixed. This blog will focus on the fact that many of those things sometimes heal rather quickly. My statement that it doesn’t always happen should not be taken to mean that it can never happen. Tommy came to us at age two and a half. He had experienced two open heart surgeries to repair a badly malformed heart valve. Once we … Continue reading →

Gotcha Day #4

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In July 2004, we were informed in a surprise phone call that the birth mother of the four boys that we were about to adopt, had delivered another boy. After a brief skirmish with state social workers, it was time for Gotcha Day for Isaiah. The other boys had been brought to us, but this time we were asked to come pick our new child up. It was to be a busy day at the state office. First, the family that Isaiah had been placed with for ten days had to bring him in. We were willing to meet with … Continue reading →

Adoption Subsidy Payments

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A very interesting article appeared in the adoption blog this morning. Some of the points intrigued me enough to write about how I feel about the subject. What got my attention was the idea that some people think that adoption subsidies and assistance are not justified. Our family is paid an adoption subsidy and given other benefits such as Medicaid and I do not feel like I need to apologize to anyone for taking it. Historically, these benefits came with every child that was adopted. We have very good friends that adopted twelve years ago. They are fairly affluent people, … Continue reading →