Book Review: I Wish for You a Beautiful Life

by Pam Connell | More from this Blogger

04 Sep 2007 04:32 PM

The voices of birthmothers, especially those from other countries, are some of the least heard from regarding adoption. A rare exception is I Wish for You a Beautiful Life: Letters from the Korean birthmothers of Ae Ran Won.

This is not a children's book, as the editors carefully point out several times. It is intended primarily for adoptive parents, so that they will have some idea of the circumstances faced by birthparents and the thoughts and emotions they have regarding their babies and placing their babies for adoption. The idea is that adoptive parents can then be in a better position to talk with their children, perhaps sharing selected quotes.

The birthmothers write these letters as part of their counseling process at Ae Ran Won, a home for unwed mothers. Thus they are encouraged to set down their feelings freely for their own healing. They would probably write quite differently if they thought their children would actually read these letters. For example, several of the birthmothers write that when they first learned of their pregnancy, they thought of abortion or even suicide. Although nearly all of them write that they came to see the babies as precious gifts, obviously this isn't something you would give a child to read.

It is a beautiful book, however. It's also a good reminder to me. As I've said before, no matter how much I talk about adoption, sometimes it seems surreal to me to think of it as it applies to my own family, because in my heart I can no longer remember a time when these children were not my daughters. Yet this book shows that maybe, as many letter writers say, someone is out there praying for my daughter and family, as one mother writes "always praying for you and loving you from far away".

And who can have too much of that?

Please see these related blogs:

Thinking About Other Parents

Three Mothers

Books for Adults on Adoption from China and Korea

Learn more about Pam Connell

Pam Connell is a mother of three by both birth and adoption. She has worked in education, child care, social services, ministry and journalism.

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