Search Results for: blog attachment parenting of adopted children

Bravo’s “Extreme Guide to Parenting”

Posted on by

How would you describe your parenting style? Some parents will answer that question by stating that their parenting style is traditional, or conservative, or “old-school”. Others might explain their parenting style as “eclectic”. They take some ideas from how their parents raised them, and add in some new concepts that have become popular in the years since they were children. No matter what your parenting style happens to be, it is unlikely that it matches up with the parents on Bravo’s new TV show “Extreme Guide to Parenting”. Season one featured 10 different families whose parenting styles have been described … Continue reading →

Baby Wearing and the Adopted Toddler

If you have done much reading on helping your adopted child attach then you probably have heard of baby wearing and are familiar with its’ benefits. Just in case you have never heard of baby wearing, though, here is a simple definition: Carrying or “wearing” your child close to your body in a sling or other carrier in order to promote bonding and attachment. Baby wearing has been shown to have many benefits for all children, but especially for adopted children. It provides closeness that encourages bonding, it keeps your child at your level and it allows your child to … Continue reading →

Stockholm Syndrome and Attachment Disorders: My Thoughts

It might seem odd that I find a connection between Stockholm Syndrome and Attachment Disorder but, for some strange reason I do. In our walk as adoptive parents I have found many who doubt the true depth of an attachment disorder, and tell us they simply don’t understand what the problem might be with a child who can’t accept and love parents after living a difficult life. Yet, these same doubters are willing and able to accept the fact that a well adjusted person could be kidnapped and abused into bonding with their captors? Stockholm Syndrome is a term used … Continue reading →

Attachment Parenting-More Time.

In the last Blog, we talked about Attachment Parenting and understanding the concept that Time plays when adopting an older child. Time in terms of days weeks, months and years. I have written about family traditions, making memories and creating understanding about house rules and all of those parenting tools require the other kind of time. This is the undivided, full and complete attention kind of time. Ordinary families do spend a lot of time when a new baby is born, just caring for the basic needs of the baby. We aren’t surprised when a new parent complains about being … Continue reading →

Attachment Parenting-House Rules.

Families fostering or adopting older children are usually well trained with ideas on making transition and family living less stressful for everyone. One very important tool adoptive parents of older children are encouraged to use is some kind of “House Rules” system. It’s helpful for everyone involved to understand what the expectations are from the start. Most families are encouraged to put the rules down in writing, either a poster or a contract depending on the age of the child. House Rules give adoptive parents the chance to let a child know what happens in their Home. In my training, … Continue reading →

Attachment Parenting-Routine

It’s difficult to argue with all of the evidence indicating people live less stressful lives when they have a routine. It might be a hectic routine, but having some predictable plan takes away the element of surprise. Some people do enjoy a more spontaneous lifestyle and that’s fine when they are in control of their lives and adults. Most children do very well when they live in a home with a well-established routine. Knowing when and where meals are eaten and having some kind of a mealtime ritual provides a sense of belonging to something bigger then just who we … Continue reading →

Attachment Parenting-Making Memories.

I don’t think that everything I do with my children revolves around the fact they were adopted. Many of my parenting ideas I learned with my older children Sean and Tori and as different as it is to be an adoptive parent some things are just about the kind of family we want to be. I have always wanted to be the kind of family that makes an effort to create memories. And, I don’t consider memories to only be those big things. The holidays and vacations will create memories on their own. The memories I enjoy creating are the … Continue reading →

Attachment Parenting-When A Child Has A History.

I am a firm believer that most children thrive in an environment where one parent is home typically the mother. I feel all children do well when they have a parent at home, and are able to spend the bulk of their lives in their home with their parents. School and other activities are wonderful, but when these things are not happening there is no place like home. An adopted child especially benefits when one parent can be a full time stay at home parent. At least during the first year to three years, I feel it is especially important … Continue reading →

Attachment Parenting-Responding

Most parents don’t sit around and plan how they will respond to their child’s needs but when attachment parenting an adopted child planning can really make a big difference. A child we have parented from birth will develop a way of letting us know what they need, and when they are happy or not. A child with only one set of parents from birth has consistent care and knows what to expect from their parents. A child with a strong feeling of safety and security will know and trust us to respond and to be consistent in the way we … Continue reading →

Attachment Parenting of Adopted Children.

It’s important as a parent to recognize the developmental milestones and expectations we have for our children. Most parents understand it takes awhile for a newborn baby to learn how to walk and talk so no one is worried when a newborn doesn’t get up and walk. That would be a silly expectation and most people understand that it is not a developmental milestone for a newborn to walk. Most people understand that walking on average happens around the age of one-year-old. The stages of Adoption have certain developmental milestones as well, however most people don’t understand what these milestones … Continue reading →