Adoptive Parents Need Rest

by Fatherofeight | More from this Blogger

The adoption community uses a term that describes a brief rest from duty for adoptive parents. Respite is defined as a short time of relief from a difficult assignment. It is absolutely necessary for adoptive parents to occasionally be able to take it easy for a while.

Our first respite weekend came as a surprise. As a Christmas present, our grown children arranged for us to have a Saturday night at the finest hotel in Galveston. They stayed with our crew and paid for a meal at a fine restaurant.

It's about a two hour drive down there from our house. It was like old times, we didn't have a care in the world (at least for the moment) and we could just enjoy each other. We were so excited as we pulled up in front of the hotel.

The rooms at this hotel are very nice. About three o'clock that afternoon, we unpacked and sat down to figure out what we would do first. Three hours later, we woke up from unplanned naps. We had been sound asleep sitting across from each other in easy chairs. It was already dark. We had no idea how tired we were.

We had dinner and went to a movie. This sounds bizarre, considering this was our 24 hours off duty. We saw "Cheaper by the Dozen". For those of you not familiar with the movie, it's a comedy about a family with twelve children. Everyone else in the theater was laughing out loud. We were both doing a poor job of hiding our tears.

We were having a good time and getting rest that we desperately needed. We were in Galveston physically, but our hearts and minds were with our little boys. We did sleep until check-out time the next morning.

This trip helped us understand the concept of respite for adoptive parents. No matter how committed you are, you must rest and recharge your batteries.

Texas offers post-adoptive services to families that have adopted children out of the foster system. We now take one 24 hour period per month away from our home. We have a qualified care taker who moves her family into our house and keeps our little guys. The state reimburses us for her fee.

We now plan our trips better than we did the first one. We do not spend the whole time sleeping. By getting away occasionally, we are better and stronger parents. Everyone involved benefits from that. I must thank our grown children who had watched us burning the candle at both ends and rescued us. We have learned the lesson.

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