Adopting When You Already Have Children: Travel Considerations, Part Three

by Pam Connell | More from this Blogger

28 Jun 2008 03:03 PM

When deciding whether your children should travel with you to pick up their new sibling, think about how your child or chidren will react to the settings and events you expect to be in and encounter. If it is an area of extreme poverty, will it distress your child? Will he find it hard to see other kids in an orphanage who are not being adopted?

Parents who adopted from China describe their first meeting with their children as taking place in a hotel where their children were brought to them. That might be an okay scenario for an older child. Often adopting parents in China are with an agency-organized group with a guide, and are able to do some sightseeing.

If you will be meeting your child's birth parent or foster parent, you may want to rethink having your child there. I remember thinking, as I watched the foster mother who had cared for Meg for ten months bidding her a tearful goodbye, that my son was not there to witness the agency director take Meg from the foster mother-the only mother she'd ever known-and place her in my arms. I don't know how in the world I would have explained this to him.

Finally, cost is a factor. A few airplanes (I am aware of Northwest Airlines and British Airways, but they may have changed their programs or there may not be other airlines participating as well) offer lower fares for adopted children and their parents. Siblings may pay full fare or may receive a discounted seat, but the price still adds up.

Will you pay a penalty for changing the date of departure if your adoption process is delayed? Again, a couple of airlines waive this for adoptive parents, but consider, will you be able on short notice to book four or five seats on the same flight home? Even our trips to Korea were planned on short notice-the agency asked us to be there in 48 hours (although from the surprised reactions we got when we actually showed up, we may be the only ones who followed this rule).

Please see these related blogs:

Let Kids Know What is Going to Happen

Traveling to Our Daughter, Part Three

Traveling with Children: Learn from my Mistakes

Learn more about Pam Connell

Pam Connell is a mother of three by both birth and adoption. She has worked in education, child care, social services, ministry and journalism.

View Full Profile | More from this Blogger